🧭 I’m Still Struggling – That Doesn’t Mean I’ve Failed
Bismillāh.
This is a reminder first to myself, written in need, not from a place of knowing, but hoping.
If it benefits you too, then All Praise is due to Allah سبحانه وتعالى alone.
The shaytan tries to convince us that if we’re still struggling, it must mean we haven’t progressed. That slips undo all the effort made and lessens what is to come.
That the heaviness felt is a sign of complete failure.
But this Deen is not only for those who never fall - it is especially for those who keep getting back up.
Allah doesn’t command for perfection. He asks for return. For repentance. For sincerity. And in the life of a believer, even struggling - when it’s for His sake - becomes part of worship.
“And those who strive for Us - We will surely guide them to Our ways. And indeed, Allāh is with the doers of good.”
(Surat al-‘Ankabut 29:69)
It doesn’t say those who always succeed. It says those who strive.
💭 "I Should Be Past This by Now"
The shaytan whispers that if I’m repeating a mistake, or still feeling low, it must mean I haven’t changed. But the scholars said that struggling with sin while disliking it and taking action against it is a sign of Imaan - not its absence.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Every son of Ādam sins, and the best of those who sin are those who repent.”
(Tirmidhī, 2499 – ḥasan)
Struggle is not failure. Giving up is.
And even then, Allah سبحانه وتعالى, At-Tawwab (The One who Guides His to Repent and Accepts their Repentance) is still there. Waiting for you to return.
🧱 Build Your Fortress Now - Not After You "Fix" Everything
Sometimes I think, “I’ll become consistent once I feel better. Once I’ve fixed this. Once I’m back on track.”
But the fortress of Imaan is not something you build after the storm — it’s what you build in the middle of it. Or better yet, during ease, so it’s ready when hardship comes.
“Remember Allah during times of ease, and He will remember you during times of difficulty.”
(Hadith 19, 40 Hadith an-Nawawi)
Ease is a blessing, but it’s also a test.
We are most vulnerable to becoming heedless when life feels smooth. The fortress is meant to be ready before the flood arrives.
📌 A Letter to Myself
Dear self,
The fact that you feel regret is a sign your heart still lives.
The fact that you’re trying again means you haven’t failed in sha’ Allah. You’re walking a continuous path.
Every act of repentance is beloved to Allah. Even the hundredth one.
“Indeed, Allah loves those who constantly repent and loves those who purify themselves.”
(Surah al-Baqarah 2:222)
Keep walking. You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to be sincere.
⚙️ Practical Steps I Try to Hold On To
🌅 Never miss Salaah, It's always your lifeline.
📖 Open the Qur’an, even for one verse.
🕯 Repent quickly, without waiting for the “perfect” moment.
📵 Distance yourself from people and places that feed the slip.
💬 Name the sin or pattern, make a duʿa specifically for it, and try a new strategy.
Small, sincere actions carry immense weight. Even if all you can do today is whisper, “Ya Haafidh, Aid me,” that counts. That builds.
📿 Du’a for Guidance
اللَّهُمَّ اجْعَلْنِي فِيمَنْ هَدَيْتَ
Allāhumma’j‘alnī fīman hadayt
“O Allah, make me among those You have guided.”يَا مُقَلِّبَ الْقُلُوبِ ثَبِّتْ قَلْبِي عَلَى دِينِكَ
Yā Muqallibal-qulūb, thabbit qalbī `alā dīnik
‘O Changer of the hearts, make my heart firm upon Your religion.’
Say it when you feel lost. Say it when you want to do better but don’t know how. Say it believing that guidance is not earned. No action qualifies us. It’s Gifted to us by Allah سبحانه وتعالى.
🌱 The Struggle is Part of the Journey
If I’m still struggling, it means I’m still trying.
If I’m still returning, it means I haven’t turned away.
The one who crawls toward Allah is closer than the one who walks away.
Sincerely,
still learning, still trying —
your sister in need of Allah.
